Honestly, I keep on asking myself...What did I see in him?!?! Yes he was sweet and amazing when we were dating but now, honestly all he does is make me feel like shit, billions of girls posting stuff on his wall. makes me feel like shit. my best friend Lu picking me over him. makes me feel like shit. Him changing schools and his parents divorce. makes me feel like shit. He's a jerk to me now but I know that hes really upset and I FEEL BAD FOR HIM? What is wrong with me, I need a therapist, for many other reasons as well but this one completely baffles me. I eventually just had to sign off I couldnt believe it. I shouldnt care, it shouldnt matter! I feel like this is the only place where I feel safe saying I still like him, right after our breakup I thought I was over it, my friends still think I'm over it except I think C and Eme are suspecting things now. But they dont really know. What if I never feel as special as I did with him. What if I never get that feeling like hes so amazing and he likes me. What if another guy never holds me or kisses me like he did. He made me feel special and important but now I just feel aweful! I've never been the love type, never been one for long relationships but I liked him so much and gave the better part of a year to him and now I feel like I lost everything and I dont even know why! I really hope someone cares about me and is right for me and knows and understands me like he did.
Thanks for listening, I really needed to vent after stalking him a bit...not obsessively just looking at his page and seeing all the girls who wrote on there and how beautiful theyre smiles are and how stupid skinny bitches they look like. that sounds mean, it isnt there fault i'm resentful like this...I'm sure they're nice girls...maybe. Oh well he's transferring to a different school but we didnt go to the same schools anyways (i got to all girls, he goes to all boys) and hes transferring to a co-ed)...hopefully it makes it better but I'm not too sure right now. I know I said I'd post more about my job but thats been post poned till tomorrow because of the major breakdown going on inside me right now.
MUCH LOVE AND HUGS
SWEET DREAMS
XoXo Soph XoXo
Hey! Thanks so much for the sweet comment! I LOVE your blog, I feel like I can relate a lot to how you feel! Stupid exs making us feel like shit! Maybe you should eventually try cutting him out in some ways (delete from phone/FB etc.) so you're not tempted to stalk :) Easier said than done I know!
ReplyDeleteanyways good luck with everything!
jaysie
I never knew there were so many people out there just like me, and when i see blogs like yours it makes me smile so big. i appreciate the comment muchos! i can assure you there will be another guy for you. dont sweat it, he is a grain of salt compared to a real man who will come along and sweep you right off your feet like no other has before. Stay strong and dont let the little things get to you dear.
ReplyDeleteMDZQ
i know that you will find someone who treats you much better than him. a guy that truly cared about you when you were together would still treat you like a princess even though you arent together. he sounds like an immature little boy, and thats not what you need.
ReplyDelete